Most of us ask ourselves what we can do to be happier, but sometimes thinking about what you can do or should do is overwhelming. What about things you can simply stop doing in order to be happier?
Oftentimes being happy is just a matter of letting go of bad habits and thought patterns that are weighing us down. Here are 10 things happy people never do!
1. Get into other peoples business.
Are you constantly focusing on what other people are doing? Do you watch your neighbors through your windows, spy on your ex online, or worry about what your business competitors are doing?
If so, you probably are way too wrapped up in other peoples’ lives. When you are this focused on others, you can fill your life with toxic drama and negativity that does not even concern you. When you focus on your own life instead, you can lead a more positive existence.
2. Live in the past.
While there is nothing wrong with turning back the pages of memory, there is no such thing as turning back the pages of time. It is a good thing to reflect on the good times you have had, and even now and again to linger on your losses and regrets.
We map our way through the future using our experiences, after all. But you cannot live in the past or resurrect it. Happy people never try. They live in the now. When the now is unwelcoming, they thrive on hope for the future rather than clinging to memories of what is past.
3. Focus on negatives in other people.
Nobody comes in a perfect package, and to make things even more complicated, oftentimes our strengths are the flipside of our flaws. That means that you have to be willing to take the good and the bad in even the best people. Happy people focus on other peoples’ strengths, not their weaknesses.
4. Worry about what other people think of them.
If you are always seeking validation from others around you, you will always be less than satisfied. While it is great to be validated by others and also great to validate other people, ultimately we can only find true satisfaction and approval within. When you free yourself from other peoples’ expectations, you are finally able to be true to yourself.
It also pays off to remember that the people who truly love you will accept you as you really are. Those are your real friends and family. It is never worth it to pour energy and love into someone who cannot love you back.
And remember, until you can validate and accept yourself, you can never truly love yourself either.
5. Compare their lives to others.
This is tied to paying too much attention to other peoples’ business. When you are constantly comparing your life, achievements, relationships, and possessions to what other people have, the grass will always seem greener across the fence.
Remember you never have a full picture of what it is like to be someone else. Odds are no matter what wonderful thing someone else has that you lack, there is something amazing you have that they would give their right hand for.
Focus on being grateful for the wonderful gifts in your own life instead of running constant comparisons.